Education jokes
I once dated a math teacher. It turned out she was nothing but problems.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of kids.
Little Johnny was not paying attention in class, so the teacher told him, "Do you know what happens when you don't pay attention?"
Little Johnny said, "No, what?"
She answered, "The principal's office."
Then little Johnny said, "Hey teach, do you know what it means when you have balls on your chin?"
The teacher answered, "No, what?"
"You have a d!ck in your mouth!"
So I was at high school one day in the bathrooms, and I'm circumcised, and the kid next to me wasn't, so he showed me his pp, and he had a foreskin, so I was just playing with it until the teacher walked in, then I got fired...
A note for my old English Teacher:
Mr. Colin, who loves making a din, He thinks everyone loves him, but little does he know, That's not what everyone shows, About his life he ploughs and ploughs, About his dog Bella and his relationship woes... Mr. Colin, we do not care, When you speak, our minds are not there, Your life you have unnecessarily shared, When we see you, our eyesight is impaired... Mr. Colin, rumbling about his exceptions, Just when someone puts something in the bin, Or chatters to someone, not even causing a din, But Mr. Colin, drinking too much gin, Will flail all his annoying attention on him, He'll push his limits, right to the rim...
And just how I love flan! Oh, he's finally gone!
Why do gays get bad grades?
They don't get straight A's.
At school in a classroom, the teacher asked the kid, “If you have one dollar and your parents give you five dollars, how much do you have?” Everyone raised their hand except one little girl.
Teacher: Alright kids. 50, 49, 48, 47. What comes before 47?
Kid: AK!
Everyone else: 🚪 🏃🏾♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏾♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏿🏃🏿♀️ 🎒 🏃🏻
Why was 6 scared?
Because 7 8 9.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce out of school early!
If you're going shopping at school, what color would I like to smell: True or False?
A student got a bad letter grade, so the next day he came back with his own letter grade in his backpack: an A-K47.
The average person in 2023 is less straight than the lines my 5th-grade P.E. teacher walked in college.
Little Johnny was late to class. The teacher asked him where he was. Little Johnny said, "I was on top of Marry Hill." Then a kid comes late to class and also said he was on Marry Hill. Then a little girl that's about 4 or 5 comes in. The teacher asks, "Who are you?" She said, "I'M MARRY HILL!"
I miss school so much.
Me walking in to the office:
Principal: Tell me what you did?
Me: I told the special ed kid that the 4th story window was an end portal...
What is big, fun, [and] loud?
A school bus 🚌
I had to write an essay about Africa, and I failed because I plagiarized the Hunger Games script.
So I was doing a project in my class and my teacher asked me to give an example of allusion, which is referencing something else with a word.
So I answered, “Jane 9/11ed her little sister's Jenga kit!”
The principal's office smells nice.
Why is the orphan so dumb?
Because he didn’t have parents to pay for it.