Education jokes

What type of teacher doesn't fart in public?

A private tutor/tooter.

What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?

Impossible!

I was happy to find I could get a passing grade in all my subjects if I had sex with my teacher, until I remembered I'm home schooled.

Teacher: Alright kids. 50, 49, 48, 47. What comes before 47?

Kid: AK!

Everyone else: 🚪 🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏿🏃🏿‍♀️ 🎒 🏃🏻

Am I the only one who's on here because it's not blocked on the school laptop and I can't use my phone in class?

Cows go moo.

If you're going shopping at school, what color would I like to smell: True or False?

Q: How did the explorers get to school?

A: They rode the Colum-bus!

I say 1, 2, 3, all the kids bullied me, but now they're not so cool, cuz I shot up the school.

What's black and yellow and can't swim?

A school bus full of orphans.

Like if you hate going to school.

Where did Milky Way get its degree?

At the university.

How did the Mexican girl get pregnant? Her teacher told her to do his essay.

So I was on a Discord call the other day, and one of my friends, an American buddy, joined, and we had a conversation.

Until they said: "When did pounds change to quid?"

And I said: "They're the exact same thing."

Then they said: "But when did it happen?"

So I said: "When did school change to shooting range?"

Orphans can get away with anything really bad at school, because they can't be sent home for it.

Grandpa said, "No phone near the table," so I said, "You're not allowed near the school."

Teacher: Take a seat, class.

Wheelchair person: I've been in the seat.

On September 11, 2001, I was in geometry class.

On that day, we learned you can remove one side of a pentagon by intersecting it with a plane.

My son told me he has to bring an object for show and tell at school.

So I had him bring my wife.

What's the worst place to teach an orphan? Homeschool.

Which book takes an extreme turn and has an incredible plot twist?

- The math book. Suddenly letters appear in the calculations...