Teachers: Whenever thereโs a school shooting, hide under the desk.
Students: Hiding under desk.
Shooter: Well, no oneโs in here!
One of my students asks, "Can I have a bookmark?"
A year of school and they still don't know my name is Danny.
Why did the 18-year-old girl need a ladder to go to school?
Because it was High School.
When the teacher dismissed the class to go home,
The orphan asked, "Where do I go?"
The teacher replied, "Home."
The orphan said, "Catch me on the streets then!"
In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.
What type of alphabet does an elf learn?
The elf-abet.
What did the bison say to his son leaving for school?
"Bye son!"
Get it? Bye son, Bison!
How do people grade pedophiles?
1st grade to 8th grade.
(I know it's orphan jokes but still)
Bro, Iโm so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.
Even if orphans fail their exams, I'm sure their parents wouldn't...
Oh wait...
How can Canada be one of the most educated countries when Canadians are unable to correctly spell "analyse", "programme", and "aluminium"?
Why was the slave so happy? Because he got his master's degree.
Teacher: What is the capital of Washington?
Dumb kid: The W???
I was always told as a kid that I have to pick between being a programmer and an English teacher.
They said: you can't be a "pro-grammer nazi."
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.
Father: Son, you can do butter!
What do your teacher and your friend have in common?
They will both die eventually.
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because her students were so bright!
How did the shark do on his math test?
Jawesome!
What food makes you smart? Salt, because it's a mined food.
Whatโs a lungโs favorite type of exercise?
Breathing exercises.
I told this to my English teacher, and he said it to the class, and no one laughed. Someone help!
