My math teacher asked me what a liked term was. I told her I couldn't say, never experienced it.
Why did the slave go to college?
To get his master's degree.
Why do orphans hate health ed at school?
Their parents can't opt them out of it.
What school does a depressed middle school kid go to?
KMS.
I asked my Dad the other day, "At what age is it okay to have sex with girls?"
He replied, "When they leave school, son, they are legal."
Apparently, 3:15 p.m. is not what he meant.
Which book takes an extreme turn and has an incredible plot twist?
- The math book. Suddenly letters appear in the calculations...
Today we had a test on September 11th in school. I got a 9/11.
The Good Old Days.
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
What's the main similarity between an elementary school math class and the USA?
The class divides.
What did the math teacher write on his party invitations?
Be there or B2.
What's the worst thing that can happen to schools?
Quiet kids.
Jimmy does stand up comedy. He says, "What do you call an orangutan?"
Jake replies, "YOU!" Then everyone, including the teacher, laughs. Jimmy cries.
LOL
"Mixed vegetables is just special ed class, change my mind."
School teacher: "Hey kid, why don't you just go home to your family?"
Orphan: "My family never came back for me."
School teacher: "Your daddy must've really needed that milk."
I was walking by the gun shop earlier and saw everything was 40% off. I didn't know back to school sales were already starting.
The good thing about being gay in school is that you can be the best student and still get all the D's.
Teacher: Now class, if you are dumb, please stand up.
Class: No one stands up.
Teacher: Oh, cβmon. I know someone over here is dumb. *teacher waves her finger around the left side of the room.*
Little Johnny: *stands up.*
Teacher: Oh, Johnny, you think youβre dumb?
Little Johnny: No, I just feel bad youβre standing alone.
People say I should be proud of my autism, but truth be told, I'm only in it for the help in class.
If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.
Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.
