Education jokes

Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.

Teacher: This assignment is big.

Student (male): I have something that's big.

Teacher: Yeah, your forehead.

Why did the girl study in the tree? She wanted a higher education.

How is being gay like a geology class? You can lick all the rocks you want.

What's the difference between a boring teacher and a boring book?

You can shut the book up.

There was a solar eclipse at school and we missed it, but it was alright. Your mum went to NASA and recreated it herself.

what did Germany and Austria do after ww2?

accepted all art students

Why do orphans cause trouble at school?

So the teachers will call their parents.

I used to be in a special needs class, and the teacher sent a student (if you want to call them that) out to the hall for being late.

I asked her, "Why did you send James out to the hall?"

She said, "He was a little tardy."

I replied to her, "I thought they all were."

Today we had a test on September 11th in school. I got a 9/11.

What school does a depressed middle school kid go to?

KMS.

I saw a monkey outside of school and said, "Look, a monkey!" I got expelled the next day.

You know that at Walmart they have backpacks next to the guns? Well, I thought that it was nice to see the bags next to the school supplies.

My (at the time) boyfriend told our chemistry teacher that blood is corrosive to steel.

Anyways, my sharpener isn’t working because the blade has been too badly damaged from something else...

What is a pedophile's favorite age range?

9-11.

You're so skinny that the professor thought you were the skeleton.

My homework was to watch as much porn as I can... and tell my teacher the details so he won't get in trouble for watching it during class.

My math teacher asked me what a liked term was. I told her I couldn't say, never experienced it.

Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.

Dad: What did you learn in school today?

Timmy: Not enough, I guess, 'cause I gotta go back tomorrow.