Eating jokes
Everything is now so expensive in Africa that witches don’t serve food in dreams again. Am I lying? Okay, when last did you eat in your dreams?
What do orphans eat for breakfast?
Daddy-O's.
Why don't sharks eat n****rs? They think it's whale shit.
I want some cheeseburgers just to eat. I'm talkin' ketchup. My n***a mustard on that BEAT!
What does Aaron eat for breakfast? Food.
A girl's pussy is a muff, and when we have something against our mouths, they say our voice is muffled, so do I think the origin of the word "muffled" is talking while eating muff?
Why did the snake eat a panda?
Hey paps, BONE-appetit!
(Just eat your spaguetti.)
Why does Aaron eat burgers on a Wednesday? Because his spine is bent, and his favorite gun in Apex Legends is the G7 Scout, and he uses the speedy Spanish man.
What do Africans eat for breakfast?
E-bola Cornflakes.
What part of a vegetable can you not eat?
The wheelchair.
One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?
Did you hear about the cannibal who converted to Catholicism?
On Fridays, he only eats fishermen!
Why do poor people eat insects?
Because they're locust!
I asked my girlfriend what she wanted to eat, she said nothing. So I brought her to Africa.
A man asked his girlfriend what she wanted to eat one night, and she said "Chinese food," so he took her to China. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Indian," so he took her to India. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Nothin'," so he took her to Africa.
I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.
Two people are in a restaurant. Person #1 doesn’t order anything, and Person #2 orders a chili.
Person #1: “Aren’t you gonna eat your bowl of chili?”
Person #2: “No, you can have it.”
Person #1: “Ok, thanks...”
Person 1 starts eating his food only to find half of a dead rat! He vomits all of the food back into the bowl.
Person #2: “That’s about as far as I got too!”
Say "I hop in this:".
I made you eat your peas! 🤦
Yo mama is so short, Minions look down at her.
Yo mama is so fat that she volunteered for the Hunger Games 'cause she thought it was an eating competition.
Yo mama is so ugly when Santa Claus saw her, he yelled "Ho Ho Holy Sh*t!"
Yo mama is so old, when she walked into an antique store, they didn't let her leave.
Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.