atoms never touch, so it means, we haven't touch each other or anything, so sir, I did not drop-kick that child
The Britainβs walk in the house of the alcoholic grandad they ask Mary the mum why she had blood all over her and she said someone dropped the butter they walked into the living room and Thomas was dead on the floor
A patient visiting his doctor asked him if he had ever laughed at a patient. The doctor said, "I have never in 25 years of practice ever laughed at a patient". Reassured, the patient drops his trousers and underpants. Immediately the doctor burst out into loud raucous laughter when he sees that the patient has a penis the size of a cocktail sausage. After about 10 minutes the doctor manages to get himself under control. Swiftly apologising he says to the patient, "Sorry about that. How can I help you?" The patient says, "Have you got any cream for it? It's swollen."
Time for a random Terraria joke Q: Why did the guide die at his house? A: The player dropped his doll in the lava. (WALL OF FLESH HAS AWOKEN) :| Oh crap
Why did Helen Keller have no ornaments on her Christmas tree? Cause she always dropped them.
If someone with a lisp dropped a hammer on their foot, would they be Thor?
Now from the top, make it drop, thats a wap thats a wap
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders. As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
Christopher and Tony were tempted for a beer but they only had 2 dollars each. Christopher got an idea and run away to the butcher and see if he got something good. He came back with a sausage. So they went to a pub and ordered 2 beers and 2 whiskeys. - Are you crazy?! Said Tony to Christopher. 'We don't have any money!' - Take it easy now, said Christopher. 'I have a plan.' When they finnished drink everything up christopher put the sausage through his own zipper and begged Tony to bend on his knees and take the sausage with his mouth. The bartender saw what they did and throw them out without even paying. So Christopher and Tony kept doing the same thing pub after pub after pub. After the 10th pub said Tony: I can't do this anymore. I am drunk and my knees are in too much pain to even handle the walk. - How do you think i feel? Said Christopher exhausted. ' I dropped the sausage in the 3th pub!'
Why did the elephant get kicked out of the public pool?
Because he kept on dropping his trunks!!π€£π€£π€£π€£
Why did lil timmy drop his lollies
(He was hit by a train
whats a similarity between harvey weinstein's pants and american bombs?
They both drop unannounced and leave mass casualties
========================= (pre-election 2016) Trump Hating Comedian at seedy East L.A. comedy club -
"Hey how 'bout that Donald Trump chump.... what the fuck up with that dude, man ?
"Geeeezus, he got some kuh-razy ass shit spewing endlessly out that pie-hole, 24/8!" (< leap week, muthafukas !)
. . . "I mean, even his last name rhymes with shit that's synonymous for bein' fucked up, for instance ....
STUMP : TEENY DICK
BUMP : TINY TIT
GUMP : DIMWITTED MOVIE IDIOT GUY
MUMP : A FUCKED UP CHILDREN'S DISEASE
LUMP : IF IT'S MALIGNANT, YOU'RE KINDA FUCKED
UMP : OFTEN MAKES TERRIBLE CALLS
RUMP : AN ASS
DUMP : A PILE OF SHIT THAT CAME OUT OF AN ASS
HUMP : SOMETHING DADDY DID TO HIM DAILY THROUGHOUT CHILDHOOD
PUMP : SEE "HUMP"
. . . and last, but definitely not least --
JUMP : JUMP INTO A DEEP VAT 'O SCAT MOTHER FUCKER, AND GO STRAIGHT TO HELL BITCH !! ....
HA!HA!HA!HA ! YESSS !!
.... well boys and girls, that's gonna be about it for me, as I think my explosive diarrhea is about ready to take a big turn for the worse !"
......(splort !, plop !, drip !) ....... OOOOPS ! 'snif, snif' ........
..... ewwwwww !!
(audience growing uneasy and unruly)
"Fuhhk ! ... I better go now , 'cause I just went ! ... ha! ha! ha! ...... Yikes !!
GOOD NIGHT LAZIES, AND GERBILMEN ! PLEASE DRIVE RECKLESSLY !
(curtain drops)
(continuous laughter, guffaws, cheers, jeers, queers, beers, pants peeing, beaters beating, pepper sprayin', fists fuckin', guns poppin', blood pumpin')
"OH LORDY !!... I THINK HELL HATH FINALLY COMETH,
... AND ARMAGITTIN' THE FUCK OUTTA HEEE !!"
(one very quick curtain call, and swiftly out the back door to an awaiting taxi ............ with ALL the windows rolled down) Whew ! ............ Amen. ==============================
Youβre so trash that when I dropped you off I got a ticket for littering.
You dropped your toilet paper right and you you want to pick it up but you can't because you have π© poop in your but and it scwoshdππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Why did the child drop their icecream They got hit by a bus
If your sleeping, and you fall in your dream, you may have died, and the angels dropped you Or you don't wake up, and you were on your way to hell
I dropped my phone but itβs on airplane mode
Dear Hearing People. We, deaf people, ainβt dead. We can use our hands to talk, eat & fist your face to give you some π‘ awareness that we can understand you π― meanwhile we laugh at you π€‘ We Can even dance via vibration through music. Do you know the song W lyric like this π *white b.... accent: Ohhh.. MY God BECKY.. Lπk at her butt. IT is SO BIG. *BIG BEAT DROP* I...LIKE...BIG...BUTT...I cannot LIE π» I promise we ainβt ghosting around - Brittany Rose
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree, which will hit the ground first?
The piece of paper because the rope will stop the emo.