Downing jokes

How many emos does it take to fix a light?

I don't know because they never came down.

What do you call a downy who can't get a girlfriend?

Down bad.

Q: Get up for a chair joke!

A: Oh, never mind, you can sit down.

Why does a robot malfunction when they get sad?

Because they have a break down.

Why did the gym close down?

Because it just didn't work out.

And there's the referee taking down Ronaldo's number.

Not really the time or the place, but it's good to see that we've kept homophobia out of football.

I was at a concert in the front row, and I shouted something to the band's guitarist. He took it the wrong way and responded: "I'm going to go down there and hit you with my guitar!"

And I replied: "Is that a death fret?"

One day, I was walking down the street, and then I saw something really funny, and then I ran, and I saw a boomer, but I don't really know what I'm talking about, lol.

If you take your dog for a walk and you BOTH use the fire hydrant down at the corner...you might be a Redneck!

I sat down and wrote a joke.

A can of worms popping up and down inside a lot of people and a girl ate the can of worms: It was her imaginenation.

What goes up and down and does not move?

Stairs.

A grasshopper walked into a bar and sat down at the counter.

The bartender looked at him and said, "We have a drink named after you." The grasshopper replied, "Who names a drink Steve?"

Roses are red, chocolate is brown,

I expect nothing and still get let down!

Did you see the dyslexic kid try to write down “funeral?”

No? Shame, it was real fun.

My friend is an amazing hacker. He cut down 23 trees already.

What do you call plane crash victims?

Down to earth people.

My son told me he wanted to be Batman when he grows up. That little shit wants to be gunned down in an alley.

Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.

Here's what to do if an annoying person keeps talking to you. First, ignore them until they ask you if you're going to respond. Then ask them: if they were walking down the street and a rabid dog suddenly started barking at them, would they get on all fours and bark back? After that, continue to ignore them.