Downing jokes
Yo mama so fat that when she steps into an elevator, she has to go down.
Yo mama's so poor that when I was walking down the street, I saw her kicking the trash can, and I asked, "What are you doing?" She said, "I'm moving!"
Yo mama is so fat when she goes to the dentist, they make her lay face down.
Tork Poettschke & Jack London walk down the street together. One asks the other, "May I stand in the middle?"
How do Chinese people name their kids?
They throw a wok down the stairs.
Q. Why aren't midget jokes funny?
A. They always seem to punch down.
Q. What's an Alzheimer's victim's favourite song? A. Stand Down at Sundown.
When I die, I'll let everyone I kept dear lower my coffin into the ground.
So they can let me down one last time.
Ever noticed that "lol" looks like a person drowning?
Yo mamma so fat, when she tried to sit down the chair ran away.
Your mum so fat, she broke the stairs down to the fridge.
My grandmother made her passage on a boat. The thing wasn’t the only thing that went down.
Q: What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill?
A: A mud slide.
Sam's mum is so fat, when she fell down the stairs, I thought EastEnders finished!
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.
A panic-stricken man explained to his doctor, “You have to help me, I think I’m shrinking.”
“Now settle down,” the doctor calmly told him. “You'll just have to learn to be a little patient.”
I was reading a great book about an immortal dog the other day.
It was impossible to put down.
There was an exam music quiz question about Gary Glitter. Now, if there's anyone you don't want to associate with the phrase "shh, turn over, you've got an hour," it's him.
Shit, my bad. I should leave him alone, he just wants to settle down and have kids.
When your boy tries to have a bad day while you're on your period:
Oh, you have a cold? How rude of me. I just laid an egg, and now my body is ripping down the walls of my uterus. But can I get you a tissue?
Yo mama is so fat, when she's walking down the street, there are cracks all over the sidewalk.