DOE jokes
What does a kid and wine have in common?
Shit, I forgot, but they're both locked in my cellar right now.
Why does an orphan go to church? So they can call someone father and be loved.
What sound does a 747 make when it bounces?
Boeing boeing boeing.
Mr. Smith had four daughters. Each of his daughters had a brother. How many children does Mr. Smith have?
Why does Donald Trump love little boys? Because his hands look massive when he’s holding their tiny little prepubescent cocks.
Memes
What do you call a pig that does karate?
PORK-CHOP
When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he's pushing the Earth down.
How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them. -Hope Marie Lawson
What kind of vacuum does an abortion center use? A: Dyson.
How many orphans does it take to "test drive" a bus? It depends on how much space the orphanage has and how much space the cemetery has.
Why does the nurse need a red pen?
In case she has to draw blood.
What do the initials BIBLE stand for?
Bull In Book Lacking Evidence
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb? - None, they declare darkness to be the new standard.
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Infinite because feminists can't solve problems.
Why does Michael Jackson wear a white glove?
So he won't bite his fingers when he eats a tootsie roll.
What does the penis say to the condom? "Cover me I'm going inside."
What does an imouto ride?
Onii-san.
What does a pedophile mostly pound on a piano?
A minor.
What does it mean if you can remember a girl's eye color?
She had small tits.
How many hookers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, cause they'll screw anything.