DOE jokes
How does a skeleton call his friends?
On the tele-bone!
Q: How many men does it take to open up a beer?
A: None. It should be opened by the time she brings it in.
How many CIA agents does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't need lightbulbs--they glow in the dark.
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedophile have in common?
"Are you ready kids?"
When does a cub become a Boy Scout?
When he eats his first brownie.
My biology teacher told us "get out nice and sharp colored pencils." Does she mean as sharp as in the blades I use to cut myself?
What movie does an orphan hate?
"Spider-Man: Far From Home."
Why can’t you take an Asian guy golfing? Because you can’t drive. Every time he does, he tries to put a hole-in-one.
They say you should love your neighbor. Does that mean I have to love the president?
Son asks dad, "How much does marriage cost?"
Dad: "I don’t know, son. I’m still paying for it."
What song does Kobe Bryant hate?
"Rocky Mountain High."
What do Drew Bledsoe and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both got taken out by two jets.
How long does it take a black woman to take out the trash?
About nine months and a day.
What does Can do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
How does the cop respond to being called racist?
He said, "How can I be racist? My wife's eyes [are] black."
Nah, I'm Hawaiian but I'm also Japanese. So does that mean I bombed my own harbor?
What does Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
What do nail polish and panties have in common?
Both come off with alcohol.
If a pregnant lady murders someone, does the child get an assist?
Why does everyone call me racist?
My shadow is black.