Disability jokes

What do you call a cripple convention? A salad.

What do you call a disabled Chinese person?

Sum Ting Wong.

Son: Dad, what's dark humor?

Dad: Do you see the guy over there with no arms?

Son: No, I'm blind.

My disabled friend rolled into a burning orphanage and saved lots of kids. When he came out, the kids tried to play with him because his wheels were on fire. They called him Hot Wheels.

There was one kid that came home from school and asked his mom what dark humor was.

She said, "Well son, do you see that guy over there across the road? Go give him a high-five."

Son said, "But I can't see."

Mom said, "That's the point."

I stole a wheelchair. I knew the owner would come crawling back.

I got sent to the principal's office after telling the kid in the wheelchair to do a wheelie.

In the hospital, they need to keep the disabled patients' rooms cooler than the other patients' rooms.

Why?

They need to keep the vegetables cool and crisp.

I broke up with my girlfriend because she wouldn't stand for the pledge. She was in a wheelchair.

My wheelchair-bound friend was getting bullied, so I told him to stand up for himself.

Who is the definition of a natural-born cocksucker?

A bisexual male, a homosexual male, a bisexual female, or a heterosexual female?

A physically disabled heterosexual male.

A blind man was walking into a fish market. He took a deep breath and said, “Good morning, ladies!”

The wheelchair kid laughed at my test score, so I told him to stand up to the anthem.

What comedy skill can’t any cripple master?

Stand up.

The guy in the wheelchair at my gym can do so many pull-ups with the wheelchair on, but I said to him, "Don't skip leg day."

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal? His left shoulder.

What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."

How does a disabled man go to church? He can't, there's no ramp.

My friend wants to do martial arts, but he's disabled, so I guess it’s partial arts.

Guys, stop making jokes about blind people, they might s... never mind, continue.