Disability jokes
Q: What do you call a man in a wheelchair?
A: Disabled.
What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... "How many fingers am I holding up?"
Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.
Why couldn't she get up? Because she had no friends.
Why does Helen Keller look in the toilet after taking a poop?
Nobody knows!
Why can’t blind people read this?
They can’t see.
When the school shooter shoots the autistic kid and he thinks he's having an orgasm.
What do [you] call Tyler Brown?
A spaz.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He lost WiFi connection.
Why did the disabled chicken cross the road?
To get its wheelchair!
Which is more disabling, autism, ADHD, or Down syndrome?
What do you call a rapper who can’t rhyme?
A speech impediment.
What do you call an autistic kid with a minigun?
Special forces.
So I gave a disabled kid hot wheels. I mean cars, no I gave him literal hot wheels!
He couldn't take the stairway to heaven; he had to take the lift.
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
He couldn’t climb the stairway.
W ffseetyhggghjoi.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite type of car on fire? Hot wheels.
I made this one up myself just now.
Stephen Hawking would be a good pilot because the aircraft would be the first to take off and land in autopilot.
Why didn't Stephen Hawking ever eat chicken wings? Because he didn't exist.
Armless child: Can you give me a hand??
Me: Ok.