Disability jokes
Guy: Are you depression? 'Cause you're crippling me.
Car driver: No, I'm the guy that hit you with his car and crippled you.
Guy: Don't worry, I was already crippled because I got crippling depression.
What’s the hardest part of the vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
Everyone is a gangster until Helen Keller hits a 3 on you.
Stop joking about Helen Keller so much! It’s rude, poor woman! You all just wait till she hears about this!
Son: Daddy, what's dark humor?
Dad: See that man over there with no arms or legs? Go tell him to stand up and clap.
Son: But Daddy, I'm blind.
Dad: Exactly.
What do you call a kid on a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels.
Why does the kid in the wheelchair get bullied all the time?
Because he can’t stand up for himself.
I have cripple and depression.
What do you call an autistic kid going down the stairs in a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels!
Do you know how to confuse Helen Keller?
Put her in a room and tell her to find the corner.
He died because he rolled too far away from the wall outlet and got unplugged.
What has no legs and a human body?
A human with no legs.
What do you do with a dog that has no legs?
Take him for a drag.
How did Stephen Hawking become a billionaire?
He won the F1 Wheelchair race.
Haven’t they switched him off and then back on yet?
How Stephen Hawking died: he drove too far away from the wall and the cord got unplugged.
He went too far away from the wall, and he got unplugged.
What falls from the tree first, the autistic retard or the apple?
The apple, because the rope caught the autistic retard.
What’s black and rings the doorbell?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
How does a disabled person play chess?
I think you forgot they don't have legs.