Disability jokes
What do you call a kid on a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels.
Why does the kid in the wheelchair get bullied all the time?
Because he can’t stand up for himself.
How Stephen Hawking died: he drove too far away from the wall and the cord got unplugged.
He died because he rolled too far away from the wall outlet and got unplugged.
What has no legs and a human body?
A human with no legs.
Stop joking about Helen Keller so much! It’s rude, poor woman! You all just wait till she hears about this!
What’s black and rings the doorbell?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
What’s impossible?
Steven Walkings.
If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.
Why can't Stephen Hawking go metal detecting?
Because when it beeps, it's him!
I was in my car listening to my radio. Steve Winwood's song came on, "Just Roll With It, Baby." I said that must be one of Stephen Hawking's favorite songs; he sings it to his girlfriend.
I went up to the deaf kid and said, "I’m going to punch you in 3, 2, 1." And he ended up with a broken nose, and I said, "You should have listened to me!"
Do you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Neither did she.
I got sent to the principal's office for telling the kid in the wheelchair to stand up for himself.
What's black and at the top of the staircase? Stephen Hawking after a house fire.
I pushed a disabled kid over, and he came crawling back to me.
Why can’t Helen Keller drive? She’s dead.
I got my son a bike for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair all day crying.
Why did the blind man get killed? Because he never saw it coming.
How does a disabled person play chess?
I think you forgot they don't have legs.