Disability jokes

What does Stephen Hawking have in common with Bill Gates? One stands, the other doesn't.

What is one thing blind people and orphans have in common?

They both can't see their parents.

Me and my girlfriend broke up, and I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sister's knickers the other day. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she was wearing them at the time. It made the rest of the funeral so awkward.