Difference jokes

Q: What's the difference between me and a priest? A: A priest isn't turned on by dead children.

What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? None, you are both dead on the inside.

What’s the difference between Jimmy and a normal kid? Jimmy is fat.

What is the difference between a flat tire bicycle and a woman?

Answer: You need to pump the tire on the bicycle before you ride it, while a woman you need to ride her and pump.

Porn.

What's the difference between a Thanksgiving turkey and my kid?

I only stuff the turkey.

What's the difference between you and me? You're not strangling a man with a cloak on.

What's the difference between Paul Walker and my computer?

When my computer crashes, I actually give a fuck.

What's the difference between America and a flash drive?

One is USA and the other is USB! 😂😂😂

What's the difference between a gun and chips? When you bring it to class, everyone starts wanting to be your friend.

What’s the difference between Jesus and a hooker?

The look on their face when you're nailing them.

What's the difference between Stephen and a car? A car loses oil, Stephen loses the ability to walk.

What's the difference between a grape, an apple, and an arm? You don't slice a grape.

"You're da bomb!" "No, you're da bomb!"

In America, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.

What is the difference between a feminist and a vegetarian? A vegetarian doesn't eat meat for moral, religious, or health reasons. However, a feminist doesn't act like a bitch for moral, religious, or health reasons.

What's the difference between Donald Trump and Derek Vinyard?

A shaved head, a chest tattoo, and a moustache.

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an airplane landing strip? Don't know, neither did my dad.

What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?

The fridge don't fart when you take your meat out.

What’s the difference between a bullet and a Jew?

One comes out of the chamber.

What's the difference between your girlfriend and sister? Nothing if you're from Alabama.