Difference

Difference jokes

Kelly Clarkson

What's the difference between Kelly Clarkson and a Florida real estate agent?

A Florida real estate agent screws over seniors, Kelly Clarkson screws little children.

Rape

Q: What's the difference between rape and marriage?

A: With marriage, you get to keep the screaming woman afterwards.

Church

What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? You don't get something in return if you give money to a church.

Climate Change

What is the difference between climate change and the greenhouse effect, once a philosopher, twice a sodomite?

Memes

Gay Man

What is the difference between a gay man and a fridge? A fridge doesn't moan when you put meat in it.

9/11

What is the difference between McDonald's and 9/11?

McDonald's has a drive-through. Twin Towers has a fly-through.

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  • Golf Ball

    What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?

    A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

    Emo kid

    Q. What is the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid? A. The phrase "jump rope" means different things.

    Dwarf

    What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?

    Suck dick.

    Hospital

    What's the difference between a Catholic hospital and Michael Jackson's Children's Hospital?

    No seriously, what is it?

    Stepdad

    What's the difference between my dad and my stepdad?

    My stepdad beat my ass before he left.

    Orphan

    What's the difference between Johnny Depp and an orphan?

    An orphan has all their teeth intact.

    Antidote

    It’s important to establish a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.

    Depression

    What’s the difference between an apple and a depressed kid? The apple falls from the tree.

    Child

    What’s the difference between a child and a suicider?

    One stays quiet forever...

    Pedophile

    What are the differences between a preschool and a pedophile's basement? Little kids leave preschool.