Difference jokes
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a hockey player?
A hockey player gets to shower after three periods.
What is the difference between a wagon filled with sand and a wagon filled with newborns?
You cannot unload the sand with a pitchfork.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?
My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.
I got kicked out of the hospital.
Apparently, the sign "Stroke patients here" meant something totally different.
care to explain bitch? it seems thats what youre good at
"Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too."
What's the difference between your mom and a laundromat washer?
The washer doesn't take loads for free.
What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Corvette in my garage.
What's the difference between a grenade and your wife? There's none. Take out the ring and half of the house is gone.
What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
I've never had a lentil on my face.
What's the difference between your birth and 9/11?
One was planned.
What's the difference between yo mama and a fat ugly pig? - I never fucked that fat ugly pig...
What is the difference between an orphan and a TV?
One has more channels.
What’s the difference between a female farmer and Hitler’s girlfriend?
One bails her hay, and the other heils her bae.
What's the difference between YouTube adverts and orphans?
Most get skipped no matter how interesting they are.
What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?
One of them is an outside job.
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
What's the difference between a wizard who raises the undead and a sexy vampire?
One is a necromancer and the other is a neck romancer.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett? Six hours.