Death jokes
Why did the skeleton cross the road?
To get to skull.
One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.
The school shooter points the gun at the emo kid. While the shooter tries to shoot him, the emo kid dodges the bullets like in the Matrix and takes the gun away from the shooter and shoots himself.
You have five seconds to kill me. 1... 2... 3... 4... Thank you. I can rest now. WAIT, HOW AM I TALKING?????????????????????
My joke is your life support getting unplugged because my phone is about to die.
Why did the student at Blacktown Girls cross the road? To go to heaven. HAHAHA
Why did the FBI get a foster family for an orphan?
So he could be in a lovely family before death.
Myla, what did you do for Father's Day?
Myla: I went to a restaurant.
Timmy, what did you do for Father's Day?
Timmy: I went to a concert.
Olivia, what did you do for Father's Day?
Olivia: Talked to him through an ouija board.
He got a paper cut and bled out.
One time I fucked this chick so hard, she almost came back to life.
How do skeletons get COVID?
From the coffin!
What did a skeleton say when he's alone?
"I'm so bonely..."
Which is redder: a baby or a red car? It depends on how the baby was killed!
Why can’t orphans eat cereal with milk? Cause mummy never gave them some.
My friend said she was tired of seeing me every day.
So I pushed her off the side of a cliff.
Yesterday I had a party in my basement.
I got questioned a lot about 5 dead kids in the corner shut in a box. I did that when I was 13, damn I forgot about them!
My brother went missing 5 years ago. He also supported TRUMP. He is currently dead in my basement in a chest in a cupboard.
You die. LOL!
— Can I borrow a book [on] how to kill myself?
— Librarian: No, because you won’t bring it back.
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday.
God being a sniper is so fun!