Death

Death jokes

Wish

9 views ·

If the genie from Aladdin was here, my three wishes would be for you to die, your kids to have a miserable life, and for everyone you love to die.

Bus

10 views ·

Everyone always has a special person in their life someday, but I think yours got ran over by a bus.

Slut

111 views ·

Why is Death the world's biggest slut?

Death gets to f*** everyone.

Necrophilia

49 views ·

So your wife has died, and now she is marginally better in bed than before.

If you really want to get her to wiggle, simply add maggots.

Funeral

3 views ·

My friend is upset with me because I sniffed his grandmother's nickers. Not sure if it was because she was still wearing them or if it was because the whole family was watching. Either way, the rest of her funeral was really awkward.

Gold

3 views ·

A man found a chest full of gold, so he went to go tell his wife, only to remember why he was digging.

Plumber

6 views ·

I have a better version of this joke.

How to make a plumber cry: Simple, kill his family. That’ll definitely turn on the waterworks.

Orphan

8 views ·

The orphans all died!!!

Oh wait, no one cares...

Their parents are all dead anyway. We are just making them happier. They get to join their parents in hell.

Orphan

What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?

They cry...

They scream... with joy.

"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."

Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...