Dead jokes
Follow me.
I heard a noise, so I'm dead.
My dog died today. 😥
Why can't Kobe go shopping?
He's dead.
Jokes are like your grandparents, old and dead.
Why can't my grandma talk?
Because she's dead.
What do we find at the end of every rainbow?
The letter W.
Why can't depressed people make depression jokes? Because they can't talk if they are dead.
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
So many things are going through my head.
How am I not dead yet?
I dumped the dead, disabled person's body into a dumpster full of rats.
What do you call a dead polar bear?
Anything, they can't hear you!
What's the difference between Donald Trump and an orange?
The orange tastes good.
Corpses aren’t funny—they’re dead serious.
what do you call it when a person dies in Panera Bread?
Panera dead.
Best way to trick your friends:
A brick falls out of a plane.
How do you put an elephant in the fridge? Open the door, put him in, and close the door.
How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? Open the door, take the poor elephant out, put the giraffe in, and close the door.
The animal kingdom is throwing a party, all the animals are there except for one, who? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge.
Sally needs to cross the river that is known to be filled with deadly crocodiles, but she crossed safely, how? Because the crocodiles are at the party, but Sally still dies after crossing the river, how? Because she was hit by the flying brick.
Twin Towers, more like dead towers.
What do you call an African that is not hungry? Dead.
The walking dead.
Suicide won't work, I'm already dead inside.
I don’t have another talking stage in me. 🤦🏿♂️ Do you squirt, and is your BD dead? 😭