Why do I only date orphans? Because they never have daddy issues
3 boy chiwawa were hot about this girl chiwawa. She tells them I will date whichever one of you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence. First dog say... I love cheese but liver is bland. She replay.. Really original. Next dog.. I love liver but chesse makes me constipated.. She replay.. Ewe gross. Third dog steps up.. Man Liver alone cheese mine. Winner dog 3.
The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
a girl and a boy were on a date, the boy kept farting. the girl asked, What Is Wrong?!?!the boy replied, "explosive diareah." the girl said ew.
The boy went to the bathroom, and the place exploded. the center of the explosion, the bathroom.
What do you call mo on a dating website? tissue face
Stephen hawking went on a date last night She left after 15 minutes complaining she didn't like his tone
What do you call a person who tries to get you on a dating website.... a Brodie
Roes are red violets are twisted come back to my place you might get fisted
What’s the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus’s birth date.
There was this kid who was going to take a girl to the dance. He had fancy clothes, fancy shoes, etc. Finally, the day of the dance came. He happily drove over to the girl's house. When he got there, he said to her father, "thank you for this moment, have a great night".
At the dance, the girl asks the boy, "can I have some food?" He gladly replies "yes" and walks over to the food trucks, only to see a huge line. So he waits in line for like 30 minutes. He comes back to the girl, and she says, "thank you so much, I really needed something to eat". Then she asks for some sweets and a soda. Again the boy waits in line for about 30-45 minutes. Then he comes back, and she says, "thank you SOOOO much". Then she says she has one more request. The boy, (now clearly agitated) says, "what is it?" She says, can I have some punch? SO the boy walks over to the punch table, but to his surprise, there was no punch line.
A man asked another man if he was happy with his marriage, he replied," Yes I'm very happy. We go on date night every week. The other man asked when? She goes on wednesday and I go on thursday
There is a man and a women on a date.
The women asked what kind of things do you love.
The table starts to lift up on the mans side and the man says sorry.
person 1- I heard oxygen and magnesium went on a date. person 2- OMg
Oxygen and potassium went on a date. I heard it was OK.
Why couldn't the skeleton go to the prom, because he had no BODY to go with.... i could have said a skeleTON more jokes.. but i think that might brake your funny bone
Why can't pooh bear catch a date. Because he is always talking about his honey.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
9/11.
9/11 who?
You said that you would never forget!
How did the blind girl get a date? She said it was love at first sight
What’s the difference between a loser and a paper? A girl actually dates the paper.
What is a pedophile's favourite dating site? Kinder