Sans: why couldn't the skeleton go to prom Papyrus: Why. AND YOU KNOW I HATE PUNS Sans: Because they had NO BODY to go with Papyrus: THAT IS ENOUGH!!! Sans: Sorry didn't mean to GET UNDER YOUR SKIN Papyrus: YOU HAVE MADE ME MAD TO THE BONE SANS......wait Sans: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I told my cousin since we're not blood related our parents would let us date.
Her pants were on fire.
why do men sag there pants so low and still wear a belt
the same reason women bring their purse on a date and don't pay
Visiting Alabama? Pop-up dating ads be like: "Never be lonely at cousinsonly.com."
I dated a German girl, it was very annoying when she kept on screaming her age and moaning.
You should never date a prospector. They're all just gold diggers.
Why are there no women in the NFL? Commissioner Roger Goodell firmly believes in equal opportunity. So the girl tries out. Then, if she makes the team we gangbang her to death. I mean, could you imagine what a scary birch shed have to be?
Why do I f-uh-c-k my mom? Like father like son. #batabababa
Why did I fuçlc my dad? So I could have s€x without my mom finding out. Should I not have done that?
Why is sex with pandas so much fun? I don't know it just is. 🐼
Why won't my boyfriend eat my pie? His brother made it.
So I walk into Orchids Of Asia. I come out three minutes later with the best massage of my life. What's the catch? Aigh there maytee thy catch o the day be crabs.
Knock, knock. Who's there. My penis.
Why did the bone go on a blind date? He was bonley.
22 remember that 18 year old girl I set u up
with no
Why not To old
A guy walks into a bar. He sees a hot girl. He walks up to her and says, "You're getting laid tonight." She replies, "What are you, some sort of psychic?" He says, "No, I'm just stronger than you."
Is it weird that a Milk Carton has a date and I don’t.
ever noticed 9-1-1(the number for the po-po) is the Great Date(9-11)...Hmmm.
When Lexa took Clarke out on a date, she walked past the candle shop, she bought all the candles. After the date, they went back to the Heda's (Commanders) Tower, which is basically a huge candle. "All I wanna do is Candle you"
(Lexa and Clarke from 'The 100' [ #LexaDeservedBetter ] R.I.P. Lexa...)
I used to date a girl named Ruth, but she broke up with me and now I am ruthless.
