Date jokes
Q. What's a necrophiliac's favorite dating site? A. Find a Grave.
I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.
Why was 10 scared? Because of 9/11.
I dated a lot of girls before I married my wife. I was living with one of them when I arrived home one day to find her bags packed and next to the door. I asked her, "Baby, what's going on?" She said, "I'm leaving you."
"But why?" I replied.
"Because you're a pedophile!" she answered.
"That's a pretty big word for a six-year-old," I said.
About to go on a date.
But she was late.
So I got some tape.
And eventually punished her with rape.
"9/11" or just "7-Eleven" to a Mexican person.
Why are Black women dating white men?
So their kids don’t have to worry about not meeting their father.
I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.
I guess you can say she had me in a trans.
What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?
"Hi, nice to meet you."
Yo mama so fat, when she went to a dating service, they ended up matching her up with Pittsburgh.
How can a person from Alabama tell that someone is an illegal immigrant?
If they are dating someone that isn't related to them.
I used to think 11/11 was mistakenly 9/11.
Roblox Brookhaven be like:
"ABC if you wanna be adopted."
"ABC if you wanna be my friend."
"ABC if you wanna be a banker."
"ABC if you wanna rob the bank."
"ABC if you wanna date."
"ABC if you wanna sex."
What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman?
Getting her husband's voice just right.
Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister.
BlessedBrian must have been born on April Fools’ Day... because he’s a joke every day of the year.
Why is 10 scared of 11 and 9? Because he's in the middle of 9/11.
Who needs dating apps when you have family reunions?
This is not a joke. Stop online dating.
What does it mean when a man has a dodgy past? It means he has skeletons in his closet.
What does it mean when a man likes Lana Del Rey better than Ed Sheeran? It means he has a closet full of women's leather pants (but no women in their dating history).