Dark Humor
Santa and Bill Cosby's favorite quote: "Don't be dumb, make sure they're numb, and always use a condom!"
I told someone some jokes, y'know? "Fruit Ninja," "barcode legs," "French puppet thigh wrings." And she was like saying that's not cool and stuff. So she reported me, and it was like:
The counselor: "So I've heard you've been making sh jokes?" Me: "You say it like it's a bad thing." Her: "It is." Me: "Chill bro, it ain't that deep. Don't worry I'll end it :)"
you.
Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor jokes?
It can't hit home.
Nurse: Don't worry, I'm great with babies. Parents: You are? Nurse: Yeah, I always abort them. Parent:... Parent: You're hired.
I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.
If only they had more mosquito nets in Africa, we could prevent millions of mosquitos dying needlessly of AIDS...
What's an Emo's favorite drink?
Water, JK it's cyanide.
How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them. -Hope Marie Lawson
What's the best thing about abuse jokes? The punchline.
I can tell a joke :)
Twinkle, twinkle, there's a car Coming like a shooting star. I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.
Did you hear about the cannibal who passed his brother in the woods?
What do a relationship and suicidal thought have in common? They’ll both end soon.
How do you get an emo kid to jump?
A bridge.
I was hit on by President Kennedy, too bad I shot him down.
Emo kids counting be like: 1, 2, 3 come hang with me! 4, 5, 6 Gonna get new slits! 7, 8, 9 Suicide! 10, 11, 12 Bring some pills!
How do you execute a retard?
The Electric Wheelchair.
So, a few hours ago my friend said I need to CUT it out with the s/h jokes... like... it's really not that deep?
Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind.
Knock knock Who’s there? Not Sally.
What do you do when you finish a magazine at the hospital?
Reload and keep shooting.