Dark Humor

Santa and Bill Cosby's favorite quote: "Don't be dumb, make sure they're numb, and always use a condom!"

I told someone some jokes, y'know? "Fruit Ninja," "barcode legs," "French puppet thigh wrings." And she was like saying that's not cool and stuff. So she reported me, and it was like:

The counselor: "So I've heard you've been making sh jokes?" Me: "You say it like it's a bad thing." Her: "It is." Me: "Chill bro, it ain't that deep. Don't worry I'll end it :)"

you.

Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor jokes?

It can't hit home.

Nurse: Don't worry, I'm great with babies. Parents: You are? Nurse: Yeah, I always abort them. Parent:... Parent: You're hired.

If only they had more mosquito nets in Africa, we could prevent millions of mosquitos dying needlessly of AIDS...

What's an Emo's favorite drink?

Water, JK it's cyanide.

I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them. -Hope Marie Lawson

I was hit on by President Kennedy, too bad I shot him down.

What's the best thing about abuse jokes? The punchline.

I can tell a joke :)

Twinkle, twinkle, there's a car Coming like a shooting star. I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.

Did you hear about the cannibal who passed his brother in the woods?

Q: How are Clocks like Pedophiles? A: They both stop at 12.

How do you get an emo kid to jump?

A bridge.

What do a relationship and suicidal thought have in common? They’ll both end soon.

This girl came to me and said, "I got raped in my sleep!"

I replied, "I done it as a joke."

-April 1, 2020

Emo kids counting be like: 1, 2, 3 come hang with me! 4, 5, 6 Gonna get new slits! 7, 8, 9 Suicide! 10, 11, 12 Bring some pills!

What do you do when you finish a magazine at the hospital?

Reload and keep shooting.

What's the difference between necrophilia and a choking fetish? 15 seconds.