Dad

Dad Jokes

History

I’ll never forget my dad’s last words. “Erase my search history, son.”

Orphanage

One morning I saw three kids were bullying one other kid because they didn't have a dad...

Later that day the three same kids were walking toward an orphanage. :)

Mom

Your mom and dad are never coming back because dad is cumming for another kid.

Orphan

Why do orphans hate Cocomelon?

Because his mom and dad are in every episode!

Map

What's the same with your dad and Retail Row?

They are both off the map.

Page

"When someone asks for a dad joke and you send them to the orphan page."

Milk

Milk makes you tall, right?

Well how did you get tall if your dad didn't come back with the milk?

Friend

Me and my friend roasting each other.

Him: Your dad dropped you on purpose, but my dad dropped me by accident.

Me: But after dropping you, he never picked you up.

Orphan

Have you ever wondered why orphans hate milk?

'Cause their dad never came back with it.

Milk

My dad said he'd get the milk, but he forgot I was in his car.

Lie

Dad: Johnny, Johnny?

Johnny: Yes, Papa.

Dad: Getting women?

Johnny: Yes, Papa.

Dad: Telling lies?

Johnny: No, Papa.

Dad: Well, you're 100% lying because you get NO WOMEN!

Actor

Dad: I heard an actor killed themselves with a knife. It was Reese something.

Mom: Witherspoon.

Dad: No, with a knife, you dummy!