Your dad's penis was chopped off at the age of 2.
Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Dad!
Dad who?
Silence.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Dad!
Dad who?
*Silence*
What did Adam say when he saw Eve?
Answer: "Woman!"
It was 7:00 a.m. when Billy ran downstairs after a long night of sleep. He got to the kitchen where his mother and father sat. "What would you like for breakfast?" Billy's mom asked politely. Billy replied with, "Whatever Dad gave you last night in your bedroom would be great! You seemed to like it very much!"
When your friend does a finger-gun and his dad appears behind him and does it too, with the real deal!
My dad told me that his dreams were shattered a few years ago.
Then I asked him how many years ago.
He replied with, "When were you born?"
Dad: "Son, does mommy like having lady-friends over?"
Son: "Nah, mostly men."
Dad: "Do you think you'd be comfortable telling that to a judge in court?"
My dad is like Hurricane Katrina. I haven’t seen either since 2005.
My credit card is more declined than the love from my dad.
When you send a dick pic and she sends one back I'm glad mine is the biggest, so I get to fuck my dad again
What's the difference between my dad and my stepdad?
My stepdad beat my ass before he left.
I was in Alabama last year. I walked into a store and noticed a couple kissing each other, and I said, "Excuse me, where is the bathroom?" The man said, "Right over there." I went into the bathroom and then heard the girl say, "Dad, I have to go to school soon."
My dad and cancer go into a fight. I never saw my dad after that.
What's the difference between a boomerang and my dad?
My dad came back!
What's the difference between calling someone dad or daddy? How you come from his balls.
Ur mom gay, ur dad lesbian
This boy heard from a friend that if you tell an adult, "I know the whole truth," they will be all weird. So he went home and told his mom, "I know the whole truth," and she gave him $20 and said to keep quiet.
Pleased, when his dad got home, he said, "I know the whole truth," and his dad gave him $40 and said, "Don't tell Mom." Really pleased, he met the mailman the next day and said, "I know the whole truth." Then the mailman got down on his knee, opened his arms, and said, "Come to daddy."
A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.
"Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile. "May I help you?"
"I was wondering," whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the handjobs?"
"Yes," she purrs, "I am."
The man replies, "Well, wash your hands, I want a cheeseburger."
