Currency jokes
If I had a genie grant me wishes, I wouldn't wish for a million pounds. I'd just wish that every time I buy something I just have the right amount of money in my pocket at the time.
One dollar bill is with a five dollar bill. The five says, "I make more cents than you."
Your mom's just like a penny. Practically worthless, and in everyone's pants.
What has a head and tail but no legs?
A penny.
Ok, I put one penny down. Do you smell anything?
1 scent.
I put two pennies down. Do you see any fruit?
2 pears.
I put three pennies down. Do you see any law enforcement?
3 coppers.
I put four pennies down. Do you see any cars?
4 Lincolns.
I put five pennies down. Do you see any pussies?
NOT FOR 5 CENTS YOU DONT!
Memes
you get
Why don't some people like pennies?
Because it's common cents.
The cashier kicked me out because when he asked for 99 cents, I gave him 99 scents.
What do you call a peso?
A wetback greenback.
I am like currency; people always trade me out for someone better.
That is a "Penny-Farthing" bicycle. Dimes if you feed it beans.
Why did the man laugh when he only had just one nickel and one penny in his pocket?
He had a 6 cents of humor.
No, "quarter quarter."
Why doesn't George Washington carry his ID?
Because he knows he can always ask for a quarter.
How do rappers make their money?
By dropping dimes.
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
A rhyme scheme that's all about the Benjamins!
🇻🇪 Finally, I am a trillionaire. Now I can buy bread.
What has a tail, a head, but no body?
A coin.
What has a head, a tail, but no body?
The 10 cents said to the 1 cent, "Haha, I make more cents than you!"
What is the cheapest meat?
"Deer balls," they're under a buck!