Currency jokes

What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well, beer nuts are 49 cents, but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer, you won’t understand it.)

The 10 cents said to the 1 cent, "Haha, I make more cents than you!"

I will give you a nickel if you tickle my nickel pickle, Rick.

What do cows call money?

Moola.

Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.

What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?

A rhyme scheme that's all about the Benjamins!

My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."

Yo mama's so fat, when she sits on a dollar, four quarters pop out.

What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.

So I was on a Discord call the other day, and one of my friends, an American buddy, joined, and we had a conversation.

Until they said: "When did pounds change to quid?"

And I said: "They're the exact same thing."

Then they said: "But when did it happen?"

So I said: "When did school change to shooting range?"

My friend lives in a caravan park. His parents named him Money because they thought it was a type of currency.

There was a little boy named Chris who was addicted to Roblox.

One day, his grandpa fell into a deep coma caused by a head injury.

One day, little Chris went to visit his poor grandpa. He brought his Windows 10 too, but it had no charge in it. After pulling out some wires and placing his into the wall, he started to hear a long beeping sound, but ignored it and continued to play Roblox. Chris's parents came and saw what had happened.

The dad then yelled, "You dumb f***, you killed my father!!!"

Then Chris said "Yeah. He was worth robucks, too."

If I had a dollar for every gender, I would have 2 dollars and a bunch of counterfeits.

What is money called in space?

Star bucks.

People are pushing for a new black Lady Liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again.

OMG, you will give me Discord Nitro and Robux?? Sike, I lied!

What has a head and tail but no legs?

A penny.

If I had a dime for every time someone has told me to kill myself, I'd be a millionaire.

Which president has never gone to jail?

Lincoln because he's innocent in a cent, get it?

What do you call a peso?

A wetback greenback.