Currency jokes
What's the difference between 63 cents and Princess Diana?
It's easier to scrape up 63 cents.
I am like currency; people always trade me out for someone better.
What does the cent say when it says hello? It waves.
If I had a dime for every time someone has told me to kill myself, I'd be a millionaire.
What has a head, a tail, but no body?
What concert only costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
Do you want to hear a money joke? "Never mind, it makes no cents."
If I had a loonie for every degree I have, I wouldn't have a loonie.
Penny.
What has a head and tail but no legs?
A penny.
Yo mama like a penny: two-faced, worthless, and in everybody’s pants.
I'm not calling you a slut, I'm calling you a penny: two-faced, worthless, and in everyone's pants.
What is the capital of Greece? -- About 10 dollars.
Which president has never gone to jail?
Lincoln because he's innocent in a cent, get it?
Yo mama's so fat, when she sits on a dollar, four quarters pop out.
The 10 cents said to the 1 cent, "Haha, I make more cents than you!"
How to get free robux: buy robux to make a game to get more robux.
Why did the man laugh when he only had just one nickel and one penny in his pocket?
He had a 6 cents of humor.
My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."
A man who drinks a lot is told by his wife that if he ever gets drunk again she will leave him.
Later, the man goes to a pub and drinks a lot and throws up all down his jacket. 'Oh no,' he says to his friend, 'if I go home like this again, my wife will leave me.' 'Don't worry,' his friend says. 'Put a £20 note in your jacket pocket. When your wife challenges you, produce the money and say another man threw up on you and gave you the £20 note for the dry cleaning.' 'Brilliant!' the man says and goes home. He walks through his front door and his wife sees him. She is furious. 'No no,' the man says, producing the money from his inside pocket. 'A man threw up on me and gave me £20 for the dry cleaning.' 'What's the other £20 note for?' asks his wife. 'Ah, that's from the man who shat in my pants.....'