Culture jokes
Dmitri! Where's my vodka?
Why did the alarm go off when the emo and his friends left the store when they checked everything out?
The emo forgot to roll his sleeves up.
Why did Michael Jackson go to Sea World?
To free Willie.
What do you call a gay guy on the BBQ?
LGBBQ.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Egg surprise!
What I if told you
Who was the most successful transgender and transracial person in history?
Michael Jackson. He grew up a poor, black boy, and died a rich, white woman.
Roses are red, the Jews are a cult.
I've practiced Metzitzah b'peh on adults.
Dark humour : hell!!! Aren't people racist!!!
A Chinese drunk and a Jewish drunk are sitting together on a park bench.
After finishing his drink, the Jew takes his bottle and smashes it over the head of the Chinese drunk.
"What the hell was that for?" asks the Chinese man, rubbing his head.
"That was for Pearl Harbor!" replies the Jewish drunk.
"Pearl Harbor? That was the Japanese! I'm Chinese!" he exclaims in return.
"Eh, Chinese, Japanese, Korean... you're all the same to me," the Jewish man explains as he gets up to leave.
The next day, the two drunks are back on the same park bench. The Chinese drunk suddenly takes his bottle and smashes it over the head of the Jew.
"Why the hell did you do that?" the Jewish man stammers.
"That was for the Titanic!" explains the Chinese drunk.
"The Titanic? What are you talking about? No one attacked it, it sunk when it hit an iceberg!" the Jew replies.
"Eh, Iceberg, Goldberg, Greenberg... you're all the same to me," the Chinese drunk happily retorts.
A blondie and a redneck jumped off a building. Which one will land first?
The redneck because the blonde will ask for directions.
What do you get when you cross a redneck and another redneck?
Incest.
What's the worst part of breaking up with a Japanese girl?
You have to drop the bomb twice until she finally gets it.
How do you make an Indian explode?
You press the red dot.
A young boy is in a tepee with his father, just after his sister's naming ceremony. Curious to how it works, he asks his dad, "Father, why is my sister's name Tulip?"
His father responds, "That is her name because a tulip was the first thing she saw when she first opened her eyes."
The boy was still puzzled. "What about big brother Sparrow?"
"His name is Sparrow because a sparrow landed on him when he first began walking."
The boy finally asked how he was named. "Well, we decided to name you the same way as your sister."
The boy nods with understanding, "Thank you, father."
"No problem, Two-Dogs-Fucking."
What kind of cigarettes does a hippie smoke?
Yours.
What does a foreigner say when he comes to America?
I don't know, I don't speak foreignish...
What do you call it when an Arab girl has an abortion?
Removing a bomb.
Why aren't there any stray cats in Chinatown?
There are, but they're just listed as "pork" on the menus.
A man gets captured by cannibals.
Every day they poke him with spears and use his blood to wash down their food. Finally the guy calls the chief over and says, "You can kill me or you can eat me, but I'm tired of getting stuck for drinks."
What do you call a disabled Asian?
"Sum ting wong."