Crime jokes
It's not rape if you're both crying.
I had a huge crush on this girl when I was eight. One recess we met together on the playground, and she brought me to the corner of the playground. That was my first kiss, and from there it got serious. I told my parents a week later and they freaked out, called the police, and they arrested my crush. I miss Mrs. Johnson.
Incest. A game the whole family can play.
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
Today someone was killed with a starter pistol. Police think it might be race related.
What do you get when you cross a road with a stalker?
Raped.
My grandpa may be a pedo, but at least he slows down in the school car park.
What is the difference between R Kelly and Kelly Clarkson?
R Kelly hits on preteens, Kelly Clarkson hits on toddlers.
I got raped by my therapist... now I know where the name comes from!
Pedophiles don't win races because they like to come in a little behind.
What did the sex offender frog say to the other sex offender frog when a hot frog passed them?
Rrrrrapeit!
Someone stole my toilet, and the police have nothing to go on.
The cops are still searching for my wife's killer. Luckily, I already fled the country.
Why did Yoda go to jail for rape?
He doesn't get consent; he just uses the force.
What do you call a swimming terrorist?
A bath bomb.
What do you call a sex offender attending church? A priest.
Friends call me crack miser, whatever I snort. My brain starts to distort! I'll be in court.
I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium, you're "being a respectful friend." Do it at home and you're "destroying evidence." Anybody relate?
What's a pedophile's favorite cooking ingredient?...... Fresh meat.
Two priests are pulled over by the police. One priest asks the cop what the reason for pulling them over is. The cop says, "We are looking for two child molesters." The priest look at each other and tell the cop they'll do it.