somebody called the cops for a school shooting, what a snitch
What's the number 1 cause of pedophilia?
Sexy kids.
What did the hooker say when she found out the cash she was paid with for services rendered was counterfeit?
I've been raped
what's the difference between genocide and mass murder? genocide is racist
what did the woman do when the armed police officer raped her?
freeze
If A wizard gets robbed by a muggle, has he been MUGGLED?????
Where do spiders commit crimes? The Dark Web
how did the lesbian die? homocide
Why does Batman cover half of his face? To let the police know that he's white.
why do blondes make bad bankrobbers? because they tie up the safe and blow the guards.
A man robs a bank and asks a woman, "did you see that?" She says "yes", so the man shoots her. He leaves the bank and sees a couple, he asks "did you see that?" "No but my wife did!" The husband said.
Did you hear about the dwarf that had his wallet stolen. Just how low can you get.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 broke into a daycare and ate 12 children before burning the building down.
what happens when a battery commits a crime? they get charged!
"Cop: I'm arresting you for downloading the entire Wikipedia." Man: "Wait! I can explain everything!"
Did you know that a majority of the U.S is afraid of the dark Especially if they are right behind you at the ATM.
Me going to jail for telling the orphan he has 363 days because mothers and Father’s Day
Did you hear about the Scottish man who murdered his wife?
He totally kilt her.
If a man kills a kid, it's called Murder. If a woman kills a kid, it's called Reproductive Rights.
grandfathers last words :Stop shaking the ladder you cunt Grandmother last words : you know how to use that hammer Dads last words : Always aim before you shoot that gun Moms last words :Turn of the stove when you're done My last thought : am I a murder
