Cow jokes
If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
My name is Bob, and I am a cow.
My grandfather was a knight, and his name was Sir Loin.
What is a cow's favorite class in school?
Moosic.
What do cows like to do?
Cow-culating!
Q. Why did the cow cross the road?
A. Because he/she wanted to watch the moooovie.
Only some understand this meme
What do cows read? The moospaper!
What do you call a cow you can’t see?
Camooflauged.
Why was the cow scared? Cause he had a nightmoo-r.
What's the song that plays at the very end of the movie, Dr. Strangecow, during the montage of nuclear blasts?
"Veal meat again, don't know where, don't know when..."
What do you call an Indian eating cows? Mooove to jail.
Q: What is a cow?
A: A bad cow.
Here's a tip for cow tipping from TheRussianBadger.
"So if you see Otis from Barnyard, make sure you blast his ass from a distance!"
What do you call a herd of winning cows?
A topside.
Farmer's Wife: Honey, where are the cows?
Farmer: Up in the mountains grazing.
Farmer's Wife: Why?
Farmer: I don't know, but the steaks have never been higher.
Teacher: Ok class good morning, we are going to start off by what kind of sound animals make.
Teacher: Ok, what sound does a pig make?
Class: A cow says mo mo.
Teacher: Good.
Teacher: What does a sheep make?
Class: A sheep says maa maaa.
Teacher: Good! Now what does a pig say?
Little Johnny: A pig says "Put your hands up and get agenst the wall you black mother fucke*."
Penis.
Knock knock.
Who is there?
Cows go.
Cows go who?
No, cows go moooooooooooo, not whooooooooooooooooooooo!
Two cows are standing in a field.
Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?
Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Your fat ass mom.
Why do cows die?
'Cuz they are to beef.