Comparison jokes
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and Rocket League? You can't stand up.
Q. What's the difference between Trump and a piece of shit? A. Shit isn't orange.
What’s the difference between a teenage girl and a cat? One’s a psycho and the other is a cat.
You look as fat as a pig.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby?
Both of their legs don't work.
What does Adam look like?
The fat ginger baby of Boss Baby.
What's the difference between a rapist's mouth and a sewer?
Nothing, they both spout shit.
What’s the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
About 140 calories.
Mariah Carey is a more legit rapper than rapboat.
"Rapeboat" makes Elton John seem straight.
Roses are red, Violets are ugly.
Violet thought she was ugly until she saw you!
That is so bad, just like you.
You're shorter than a thumbtack, like, boy, your auntie is probably taller than you.
Wife: "Honey? What do you think about my teeth?"
Husband: "They remind me of stars... yellow and far apart."
Yo hairline is so bad it looks like a fat person's stomach.
Yo, your hairline so messed up God said your hairline on the cross getting hit on that cross.
What's the difference between a Lambo and a pile of dead kids?
I don't have a Lambo in my garage.
Your eyebrows could make the bushes outside feel jealous.
What is bigger than an elephant but smaller than two elephants?
A different sized elephant.
What's the difference between my wife and her sisters?
Her sisters ate hotter, and I married the grenade.