My bitch as flat as her grannie's heartbeat.
Yo mama so fat, when she ordered a water bed they gave her the Pacific Ocean.
What is the similarity between orphans and apples?
They both get thrown out.
Q: why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns A: because knives dont have barrels
I like my women the way I like my sandwiches... A little meat between their buns.
If Sakura’s head looks like earth then her hairline has to look like the Milky Way.
What's the difference between an asshole and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?
Are you ready kids?
Your forehead is so large, if I drew an H on it, maybe Kobe could've landed.
what's does a condom and a coffin have in common? they both still have stiffs but one is cumin and one is going.
What's the difference between necrophilia and a choking fetish? 15 seconds.
Why are Michael Jackson and caviar so much in common?
They both come on little white crackers.
Amelia is hotter then my mum 696969696
What is happening? Which is better: being loved or being hated? State your answer.
What's the difference between an egg and a good wank? You can beat an egg.
Yo mama so ugly, she went to the bathroom and scared the sh*t out of the toilet.
A girl said to me yesterday, "I don't know why men act like they are better than women, we all know women are supreme." I was confused, so I asked her how, and she told me, "Well, us women have a pussy, ass, and tits, while guys only have a penis. Women have 3 things while guys only have 1. Women are obviously supreme over men." I told her, "Actually, guys have more than women." "How so?" "Men have rights."
Do you know what's the difference between a knife and a girl's argument?
A knife has a point.
I swear, in America, one school shooter can take good care of hundreds of kids, but hundreds of soldiers can't even win a war. Might as well send all your school shooters over there.
They found water on Mars. Mars:1 Africa:0
What do you get when you put a suicide bomber in a wheel chair? An RC-XD.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Orphans don't get picked.
