Comparison jokes
Your hairline is so bad, when people see the back of your head they say "nice beard!"
What's the difference between a McDonald's and the Twin Towers?
McDonald's has a drive-thru.
Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore – my face should be among them.
You've probably heard this one before, but screw it.
What's the difference between Jesus Christ and the kid I just killed?
Jesus Christ probably died a virgin.
How are genders different than the Twin Towers?
There are two genders.
How are genders and the Twin Towers alike?
There was 2, now it's a sensitive subject.
Dark humor is just like water,
some people get it, some people don't.
What do a crippled person's legs and the Twin Towers have in common? They both went down and never came back up.
You're so tall that you are a measuring tape.
The only thing longer than the Great Wall of China is your hairline.
What does an apple have in common with an emo kid?
Answer: They both hang.
Your forehead is so big, it makes Kanye's ego look small.
Your forehead is so big, I thought it was a brick wall.
Yo mama jokes are so old, like your mom.
What did the poo say when it fell out of your bum?
"Your anus looks like my mum's bedsheet which is smelly and covered in poo."
I also just wanted to add that a Goonie's anus looks like my nan's mouth.
You're so ugly, when a pig saw you, it thought that you were their family member.
What do a penis and a Rubik's Cube have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
What is similar between Hitler and Trump?
They both want to keep races out.
What's the difference between a retard and a normal person?
A normal person is not named Josh Wakling.
What will fall faster, an emo or an apple?
An apple, because the emo would get caught on the rope.