Company jokes
I was thinking of starting up a stair company, but there were too many steps to it.
T-Series.
I opened a company selling landmines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.
I started a company making coffins. The slogan? 'We're dying to meet you.'
Everybody is wondering what position Kenny will give his brother in their new company.
Probably top.
Kenny likes to be the bottom in every sexual encounter.
What’s the name of OceanGate’s next submarine?
Judging by the breathing conditions on their subs, I bet they’ll call it the "George Floyd."
You know why you never wanna fly with an orphan?
'Cause then they know they won't die alone.
Treon: I don't care about Vorkie.
Amber: You should, she could be a great person for the company.
Treon: We don't need another one, we got 100 people in here, no need. Now, Amber, please just go make yourself useful.
Amber: Fine!!!!!
My cousin just broke up with his girlfriend, and I told him, "Since your dad owns a moving company, you can already take half of her stuff."
Why can't orphans work at S.C. Johnson? Cause it's a family company.
Two's company, cheese a crowd!
I was excited to hear Apple might start selling its own cars until I learned they wouldn’t support Windows.
Is Google male or female? Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
If Joey Deacon made his own company, it would be called The Joey Deacon Company; Walt Disney should have a run for its money.
P.S. The Joey Deacon Pictures logo would have some autistic people making noises to "When You Wish Upon A Star", with the castle being the Blue Peter ship instead.
Two people are sitting in a skyscraper.
P1: Hey, what wifi are you connected to? The company wifi is horrible.
P2: Airplane wifi.
Apple created the iPhone X for orphans because they don't have a home.
Credit to my boy tippecanoe3 for this joke.
What do you call it when Panera isn’t hungry?
Panera fed.
Credit to RogueRobot for this one:
What does Panera sleep in?
Panera bed.
Where do you go when Steve Hawkins dies?
Microsoft.
My birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
What did Goodlife Fitness say to LA Fitness? "I guess it's just not 'working out'!"