Common jokes
What do a condom and a gun have in common? You should never use either one of them.
What does Michael Jackson and McDonald's have in common?
They both use 30-year-old meat in between two-year-old buns.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can’t be found.
What's common in vampires and American kids?
They both don't get old.
Joe: What do the Leafs and the Titanic have in common?
Ben: I don't know.
Joe: They both look good until they hit the ice.
Do you know how diarrhea is common in families? Because it runs in your genes.
What do Christians and gays have in common?
They both say, “Oh God” when they get on their knees.
What do orphans and police not have in common?
The police can actually go home.
What do Call of Duty and Al-Qaeda goals have in common?
You’ve got to get more than one down.
What do Hiroshima and Herobrine have in common?
They're not heroes.
What does an orphan and a female's mouth have in common?
They take in 100's of kids.
What do parents and dark humor have in common? Some get it, and some don't.
What do me, emos, and Monster cans have in common?
A barcode.
What does your dad's cock and Darryl's Savouries have in common?
I want them both in my mouth!
2 weeks here.
What do dicks and popsicles have in common?
They both like to be sucked on, and they sometimes choke you.
What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?
When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.
What do sea turtles and lesbians have in common?
They both choke on plastic.
Your hairline and the universe have one thing in common: they’re yet to be discovered.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common? I fucking hate their whiny asses and beat them up.
What do girls and rocks have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.