Comedy jokes
Most of these jokes are plane, but they still hit.
Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?
God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!
Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
My friend told me an EMO joke once, and I said, "EMO jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"
I put this joke so the amount of jokes will be 69. Also, I have 50 kids in my basement. I fed "Twinkies" last night.
What did the calculator say to his friends? “You can count on me!”
You’ve got something on your face. Wait, no, it’s just missing something. My dick.
I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon....I'll let you know.
What comes after 69?
Period.
What’s a rapper’s favorite martial art?
Punchlines.
Ever since we started quarantining, I've only been telling inside jokes.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I don't know, but the Twin Towers do.
Your hairline lookin' like it got slapped up by Will Smith.
The first ever joke:
https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/52b8feb0514efb2cbf8ca375/what-is-the-second-hardest-thing-in-the-morning?
Your hairline goes so far back it looks like it got slapped back by Will Smith.
God, you’re having a good day?
Me: Yes, beats burning in hell.
Your hair is receding more than people do when they smell you.
I'd make a joke about the chin bones, but y'all couldn't mandle it.
My friend looks more red than Mr. Krabs.
It’s weird, I could’ve sworn I saw the silhouette of a belt hurling towards him the other day.
You know why eggs can't tell jokes?
They crack each other up!