Comedy jokes
Sans: Zzzzzzzz.
Papyrus: SANS, WAKE UP!!
Sans: What is it, dude?
Papyrus: A human has fallen from the surface world!
Sans: And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??
I am dark humor.
A horse walks into a bar. Several people get up and leave, realizing the potential danger in the situation.
"Giggity."
What do you say when Trump is still president during 2020? Magic!
The only time rape jokes are okay; is when they aren't forced.
Why did Stephen Hawking make it to heaven?
He couldn't make it up the stairs.
My mom tells me to stop with the suicide jokes, and I replied with, "It's not that deep."
I was in Russia listening to a stand-up comedian making fun of Putin.
The jokes weren't that good, but I liked the execution.
Stranger: Knock knock.
Person: Who's there?
Stranger: Sugma.
Person: Sugma who?
Stranger: Sugma balls, kid!
How are this joke and the kid with cancer alike?
It never gets old.
Q: What did the porn actress say when she opened the door?
A: Make sure to come upstairs!
What did the banana say to the peel?
“Let’s split!”
Note to all.
My name is Lariah. Lariah Carla Brown, 14 years old and I am 1 of triplets. I don't understand how rape jokes are funny, and I just want to make that statement clear. I also hate orphan jokes because I WAS one. Notice when I put WAS! I also see jokes about cancer, now I know you can't be kidding. You know that cancer is a disease that many people get and could die from, so you are just wrong about that!
I was going to tell a time traveling joke, but you guys didn't like it.
Israel and Palestine jokes are hard at these times.
It’s all about execution.
What did the bird do when he ate the expired worm?
He flew up!
What do you get when you cross jokes and cum?
CUMedy.
When you see a group of pornstars sitting together looking up with their mouths open, that's when you know that Mama bird is back at the nest to feed the baby birds some worms.
Little Jonny walks in on his parents having sex. He asks what they're doing and the father says: "Well...we're making you a brother." So little Jonny runs off to let his parents finish, happy that he's going to have a brother soon.
The next day when little Jonny's father comes home, Jonny is crying out on the driveway. The father sits down next to Jonny and asks what's wrong. Jonny cries: "I won't have a baby brother!" His father is confused. "What do you mean?" he asks. "Because the mailman came by today and ate him!"