Comedy jokes
These jokes suck. Lmfao y'all gotta be more creative!
Stop making jokes about Kobe.
My daughter came home from school later than usual. I was panicking, then at 5:30 p.m. she arrived, not walking but in a bus 🚌. I asked, "Where the hell did this bus come from?" She said, "The garage in the alleyway, Mama. I bought it for five gummies and eight buttons. You like her? She is called Belle Bus." My face was just: 😑 How did you get the bus here? She replies with a whisper, "I drove her through five gardens, a house, and two police cars!" 🙃 So that explains why you have handcuffs on. "Yeah!"
A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.
I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...
Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?
Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.
Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!
Me: You can't kick me out.
Manager: Why not? Huh?
Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.
Hgftyhbcfghhgg
Vvbggcvhhhgvvhhhgvbjhhbnhhbnjbbjbbhhbj
Stop! Stop the orphan jokers!
So, I got a paper towel roll, ripped it, but started to fart when I ripped it off, and stopped farting when I got it off the roll, and then I said, "I guess that's why it's called ripping one!"
Someone telling a joke:
Boy: "My parents are dead."
Girl: "My grandad is too."
Orphan who listened to it: "That joke is dead!"
Person who told the joke: "So is your family!"
"Rapeboat" makes Elton John seem straight.
If someone made a comedy routine about Terri Schiavo, would that be considered roasting a vegetable?
The only thing shittier than rapeboats rhymes are his jokes.
Germany does a backflip. America: What is happening?
France: Want a baguette?
USSR: Help!
What should I write a joke about? Name the subject, and I’ll make a joke about it.
So I walk into a bar, and there’s people waiting in line to punch me in the face.
That’s the punch line.
What do you call funny waves? Wave Chappelle.
(This isn't really a joke btw anyway.) SpongeBob, me boy, ye ruptured me intestines with that massive c*ck of yours, agahgahagahagahagah!
What’s up with the foot feet?
What is the plural of "goose"? "Geese."
What is the plural of moose? Well, it ant meese.
Well, it’s my first joke. Please forgive me if it’s bad.
What is the funniest joke of all time?
Your face.
Watch Key/Peele "Detective."
People: Stop joking about such serious issues!
Me: Kill yourself.