Comedy jokes
What is the funniest joke of all time?
Your face.
What's the funniest joke ever?
Rapboat thinking he can rap.
"Rapeboat" makes Elton John seem straight.
The only thing shittier than rapeboats rhymes are his jokes.
Laugh.
Watch Key/Peele "Detective."
People: Stop joking about such serious issues!
Me: Kill yourself.
I am funny.
What do you call funny waves? Wave Chappelle.
(This isn't really a joke btw anyway.) SpongeBob, me boy, ye ruptured me intestines with that massive c*ck of yours, agahgahagahagahagah!
One day Billy, Bob, and Doo Da went fishing in a small boat. None of them could swim, and they had no life jackets.
Doo Da suddenly started yelling, "I got one boys!" as he started trying to reel the fish in. It was way too large for him to get onto the boat, and he fell into the water. The fish had a nice meal that night. Billy and Bob were in shock but knew they had to tell Mrs. Doo Da.
Upon arriving at her house, they did rock, paper, scissors on who had to tell her the news. Bob lost. He slowly rang the doorbell, and Mrs. Doo Da answered. "U-uhm.. we...Doo D-Da..f-fish..." Bob stuttered, then he screamed and ran off. Billy went to go retrieve his friend. Billy had a nice little talk with him and slapped him across the face to get him to just say what happened. Soon, the two men returned to Mrs. Doo Da's house and rang the doorbell again. She opened the door and looked at the two men and asked, "I've been trying to call Doo Da, and he hasn't answered, is he ok?" Bob took a deep breath and took a step forward with a smile on his face. He sang, "We went fishing, guess who died, Doo Da, Doo Da. He smiled and he said good bye, we mourn Doo Da today."
Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.
Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______
New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."
Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.
I have one policy, and that is to not make fun of black people.
Sorry, Jesus. You were white in the Bible pictures.
Stop saying "cheetah cheater" jokes. They suck!
9/11 was pretty great to me, it's just hilarious to watch people lose at Jenga.
Me: Hey, do you wanna hear a joke?
Friend: Sure.
Me: Why don't churches have WiFi?
Friend: Why?
Me: They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
Why are you making all these bad jokes about orphans? What did they ever do to you?
I hate my wife.
*cue laugh*
What was the movie about the dog called?
The woof of Wall Street.
I'm happy that I named my dog "I Know What You Did." It's funny to see how much people get scared when I call him.