Comedy jokes
I like women's rights "jokes" because they're all facts.
None of these are jokes... they're all facts!
Jesus and Satan are just basically Homer and Flanders. One tries to help the other, only for Satan to just say, "Shut up!"
Chuck: That's my sister, mister, and I'm gonna save her!
Red: snooore, snoooore
Silver: *straining to get outta buff eagle's grip*
Chuck: *goes super sonic speed and breaks outfit*
Chuck VS RED
Both LOSE!
Don't say your life is a joke, because jokes got meaning.
To all those who say this is a joke, it isn't. It's a core of humor and magic. It's a part of humor we can keep. Like if you agree.
Spend all night in a dark humor webpage.
Go to an orphanage today and read it to them.
And I'm sure if you go to a school for disabled children, they should understand it.
Yesterday on the school bus my friend in front of me said she was 41% Irish and 15% Mexican.
Then my friend sitting next to me said, “Wow, almost half leprechaun!”
Then I said, “Yeah, and 15 percent wall climber!”
My black friend told me to stop making racist jokes...
...I told him to lighten up.
Hey, you know what I told the kid in a wheelchair?
I told him to be a stand-up comedian!
Hey man, I was gonna tell a joke about 9/11, but it was just plane.
What do you call a black comedian?
Dark Humor.
A man was on the street and went up to a kid wearing rags. The man asked, "Hey, are you an orphan?"
The kid said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
The man said, "Your parents."
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent!
I would make a rape joke, but I'd have to force it down your throat.
Whenever I make a 9/11 joke, it bombs.
I think Paul Walker and 9/11 jokes are great, but when I tell them to others, they tend to crash and burn.
Friend: You are joking.
Me: Joking on deez nuts.
I never do dark jokes, but when I feel like it, I prefer orphan jokes, 'cause they're the safest option. I mean, what are they gonna do, call their parents?
Chuck Norris once said that he didn't like the plane he was riding in. Out of sadness, the plane committed suicide. How, you ask? Ask the Twin Towers.