Color jokes
Man: "I know how to please a woman." Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
Man: "I want to give myself to you." Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Man: "Your hair color is fabulous." Woman: "Thank you. It's on aisle three at the corner drug store."
Man: "You look like a dream." Woman: "Go back to sleep."
Man: "I can tell that you want me." Woman: "Yes, I want you to leave."
Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?" Woman: "Do not enter. -OR- Stop."
Man: "Your body is like a temple." Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."
Man: "Is this seat empty?" Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
Man: "What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?" Woman: "I hate you."
Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
Q: What do you get when you cross a cow and a smurf?
A: Blue cheese.
My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”
I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”
I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”
Kate ate food coloring last night. She said she was dying inside.
A dog meets a cat. The cat is black and the dog is white. They have sex on site, no cap.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
What is yellow?
What is a redneck's favorite color?
Blue.
What is red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.
What's black and white and red all over????? A zebra in a blender!
What's brown and sounds like a bell?
Dung.
Q: What is a skeleton's favorite color?
A: Blue stop signs.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I am gay, so are you.
Donald Trump is, like, really orange.
What is an astronaut's favorite color? Zoo.
Roses are blood red, violets are twilight-hued; your blood was delectable, and so was the rest of you.
What's Helen Keller's favorite color?
Corduroy.
What's yellow and blue and found at the bottom of a pool? A baby with slashed floaties.
Roses are red, violets are not, everyone at Grant High School is probably a thot.
What has 2 legs and is red all over?