Christian Jokes - Page 4 - Worst Jokes Ever

Jesus

The second coming came and went. Jesus believed he was a Christian; therefore, he could never be himself.

Rainbow

What's the difference between Jesus and a gay person?

One created the rainbow, the other one ruined it.

Memes

Religion

The image shows five religious traditions with associated quotes about love. Christian is paired with "God is Love," Judaism with "Love is God's Way," Buddhism with "Love is a Gift," and Hinduism with "Love is Truth." Islam is juxtaposed with a quote that says "Fight all the infidels until they worship Allah." There is a user tag @israeli.dude in the bottom right corner and the name John Smith in the bottom left.

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God

God's consciousness: Art.

God's unconsciousness: Christianity.

Homophobe

How can you tell if a white homophobic heterosexual man with bisexual tendencies is a Christian nationalist?

He gives anonymous blowjobs to men regardless of their sexual orientation.

Policeman

What's the difference between an American police man and a Christian?

At least a Christian kneels in church.

Religion

I don't have a joke about Christianity.

I don't want to get crucified.

Virgin

God damn it. Fuck Christianity. I'm fucking 30 years old and still a virgin.

THAT'S A JOKE GOD DAMMIT!

Preschool

Hey Gwen... I had a friend named Gwen in preschool.

The preschool was Cascade Christian and in Washington (which is close to Oregon. I read in a chat that you live there.) This is a long shot, but I think you might be the same Gwen. If not, ok.

Memes

Holiday

The image shows a comic panel with two characters. On the left side, a 'soyjak' character initially says, "Easter was actually originally a pagan holiday!" then in the second row, he is saying, "BUT WE ...", and in the third he is crying saying, "THAT'S NOT...". On the right side, a man in a priest garb is saying, "Keep complaining and we'll take Toyotathon and make it a Christian holiday too." Then in the second row, he says "You just lost Shark Week", and in the third, "SHARK WEEK IS A WEEK LONG CHRISTIAN FESTIVAL NOW."

Mother

The image shows a still of Nala from "The Lion King" with a large red circle with a line through it superimposed over her head. There is text in yellow on the right saying "THIS IS NOT OKAY". Below the image is the text "Patriotic Christian Mothers Against the Frankly Obscene Look Nala Gives Simba After He Lands On Top Of Her In The Jungle Wrestling Scene."

Poor

A black and white photo of Jimmy Carter with a quote attributed to him: "If you don't want your tax dollars to help the poor, then stop saying you want a country based on Christian values, because you don't."

Team

A photograph of the Christian Universal Ministry team from 1980. The team members are wearing red and white uniforms with the word CUM printed on them.

Privilege

A stack of crayons with labels that appear to be satirical. The labels include "Travel Ban Brown", "Lives Matter", "Auschwitz Ash", "Privilege", "Cyantology", "Spiritual but not Religious", "Statutory Grape", "Boner Pill Blue", "Insufferable Vegan Green", "Corporations Are People Too", "Baby Shit Green", "Self-Identified Blue", "Presidential", and "Your Parents' Divorce Was Your Fault, Peach".

Boyfriend

Shitpost-master general

The image is a meme with two contrasting panels. The first panel shows a cartoonish yellow face with thick glasses, accompanied by the text, "Why do yuo lift? I lift because I'm a radpilled Christian schizo lifter and I want to be just like Travis from Taxi Driver." The second panel features a black and white image of a muscular man, known as "Chad", with the text, "So I can carry my Twink boyfriend everywhere."

Instagram

An anonymous 4chan user posts a hypothetical question. The image includes a picture of Ben Shapiro. The text reads: "Let's just say, hypothetically speaking, that I have a secret Instagram where I crossdress and sissify myself. How would this contradict my Judeo-Christian Conservative values? Even if a few businessmen fucked my bussy, how would this diminish my political views?"

Lifestyle

The image shows a woman with a serious expression, surrounded by text that reads: "I only allow organic grass-fed gluten-free anal lube in my Christian suburbs". There is a small image of lube next to the text. Above the woman's head is an image of lube inside a circle with a slash through it.

Thought

Dear explain bear, so please don’t say anything rude please, but what do you think about Christianity. I do not mean to ask questions

A digital painting of a sunset with a dark red sky fading into yellow near the horizon. A large white circle is in the upper-left corner, representing the moon, and small white dots are scattered throughout the sky, representing stars. The bottom of the image is a black solid area.

Friend

A man stands in front of a private plane holding a dog. Two animated animals are in front of him.

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