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I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears, people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that

you look like barney i´m choking you too and your face is turning all purple and blue

An obese depressed mother is trying to tie a noose but can’t reach it so she calls her son for help a few minutes later son: there mother: where did you learn to tie such a good noose? son: dad showed me before he died mother: DAM HIM TO HE- slips and noose chokes her to death

After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park. Lord: Has something happened while I was gone? Gardener: Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burrying your dog. Lord: My dog died?! Gardener: Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down. Lord: My mansion?! How?! Gardener: Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains. Lord: Why was she so distraught? Gardener: She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped. Lord: My daughter! Don’t you have any positive news for me?! Gardener: Oh right! Your cancer test results!

what is red white and blue and makes me proud to live in this country? the baby in the corner I choked, stabbed, and then came on.

sing in music lesson i want to die, i want to die, i want to choke myself, break my neck and die.

Roses are red,My friend is choking.That supid bitch shouldnt have eaten my muffin.

a bully chokes me I simply say jokes on you I like being chocked :)

I learned that a strangler was targeting me. All I could think was “You’ve got to be choking me

one day a in my class we were having dat good snacc, and one of my classmates choked on a cherrio. 1 small, single, ChErRio

let me tell you a story there once was a bro who constantly choked on chodes he didnt want his bros to ever know that he constantly choked on chodes he lived in a dorm and all day he watched p... but still he would suck on some corn one day he would go to go choke on some tasty chode but his bros found out gave him a shout and kicked him out yeling that he broke the bro code