Choke jokes

I was in Portugal enjoying my lunch when I saw a man choking! I wanted to save him, but a local stopped me. “That’s Penandes, he always chokes when it matters most and ghosts in big games.” True enough, Penandes’ Ghost emerged from his body! Poor Penandes, may he get well soon!

A bully chokes me. I simply say, "Joke's on you, I like being choked!"

"Sing in music lesson"

"I want to die, I want to die, I want to choke myself, break my neck and die."

Yo mama so skinny, she choked on a SINGLE STRAND OF SPAGHETTI!

Ty choked on DT’s willy.

One day in my class, we were having that good snack, and one of my classmates choked on a Cheerio. One small, single, Cheerio!

What's an asthma patient’s least favorite vegetable?

An arti-“choke”!

What do turtles and lesbians have in common? They both choke on plastic.

A drunk guy asked his penis: 《Tell me, how can you get shorter and longer and I can't?》

《Why don't you speak to me?》

《Stop getting shorter and longer or I will choke you.》

《Oh yeah, I like it ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)》

Hhhhhhhhh ♪(┌・。・)┌

Roses are red, My friend is choking. That stupid bitch shouldn't have eaten my muffin.

What do sea turtles and lesbians have in common?

They both choke on plastic.

When you accidentally choke your girlfriend to death and then realize that it's your sister so who gives a f**k?

A friend of mine chews gum, lays back to yawn, then chokes on the gum. Then I said, "God, what, you choking on dick?"

Let me tell you a story.

There once was a bro who constantly choked on chodes.

He didn't want his bros to ever know that he constantly choked on chodes.

He lived in a dorm, and all day he watched porn, but still he would suck on some corn.

One day he would go to choke on some tasty chode, but his bros found out, gave him a shout, and kicked him out yelling that he broke the bro code.

What is red, white, and blue and makes me proud to live in this country?

The baby in the corner I choked, stabbed, and then came on.