Choice jokes
What’s a gay man’s favorite cereal?
Froot Loops
Francis Pope, Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and a little boy were on a falling airplane. There were 3 parachutes. Donald Trump grabs the first parachute and jumps off the plane saying, “The world needs my leadership!” Barack Obama grabs a parachute and says, “I need to help make choices for our world,” so he jumps off the plane. At this point, the Pope and the little boy are on the plane. The Pope says to the boy, “take the last parachute, I am too old and I’m going to die soon one day.” The little boy says, “actually there are two, you see, Donald Trump took my backpack.”
What do cannibals eat to freshen their teeth?
Mentos.
Employer: Can you perform under pressure?
Me: No, but I do a pretty good "Bohemian Rhapsody."
Why did the cowboy put his bunk in the fireplace?
'Cause he wanted to sleep like a log!
"Just say NO to drugs!" Well, if I'm talking to drugs, I probably already said yes.
I respect woman’s choices... either she wants to cook first, then clean, or she wants to clean first, then cook.
When the school shooter asks the autistic kid which hostage he wants to rape, and he looks at you like 😋.
Imagine you're playing GTA and you finally found out how to take out a gun: Option 1: shoot someone Option 2: suicide
Me: Aren't they the same thing?
What’s a 9/11 victim’s least favorite song?
Drowning Pool - Bodies.
My sister and I were hanging out when she opened her drawer and pulled out 3 condoms and said, "Pick one."
I either want to hang, stab, or shoot myself. I'm dying to choose.
I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.
I met an orphan with a dog yesterday. I chose the dog.
Like if you will sub to Patty Mahomes.
Comment if you will sub to Parker Finch.
The quiet kid starts playing "Pumped Up Kicks" in the parking lot before school.
What is a orphan's favorite song?
"We Are Family."
Q. What type of flour do orphans get?
A. Self-raising flour.
Why did the orphan want to become a prostitute?
To get a daddy.
What does a skeleton tile his roof with? Shingles!