Children jokes
Why do orphans hate Christmas?
Father Christmas isn’t a thing.
Why is the last part of orphanage "age?"
Because it doesn't matter your age.
A kid goes into a restaurant without parents, and a waitress came up and said, "You have to leave; this is a family restaurant."
A priest and Rabbi run out of the orphanage.
Priest: "How the hell did that fire start?"
Rabbi: "I don't know, but what about the children?"
Priest: "Fuck the children."
Rabbi: "Do we have time?"
Priest: "There's always time for something like that."
Q: Why do orphans like boomerangs?
A: They come back, unlike their parents.
What time is it when your kids stay home from school? S'no time!
Michael has canceled his upcoming dates. They were Tommy, age 9, and Bobby, 11.
A father is talking to his three kids.
Kid 1: Why is my name Rose?
Dad: Because when you were a kid, a rose fell on your head.
Kid 2: Why is my name Lily?
Dad: Because a lily fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 3: Auughhghhhggghhh!
Dad: Oh hey, Brick.
Why do pedos hate corona? Because they have to stay two meters away from children. 😈
When I become a parent, I’m gonna regurgitate my food to feed my children.
It’ll give me an excuse to make out with my daughter.
My parents love me.
What’s harder than steel?
Michael Jackson in a playground.
What has ten children crying, naked, and screaming for their parents?
My big green pedo machine.
What do you call a white kid at the back of class?
A school shooter.
I love orphans, so at least they know someone loves them.
What’s a depressed kid’s favorite game? Hangman.
Why do mostly younger orphans get adopted?
Because who wants a traffic an adult?
Why am I banned from my Catholic orphanage?
Because the children kept calling me "daddy."
What do you call a disabled kid who is blind?
A grape chilli bean.
You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?
Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.