Childhood

Childhood jokes

Orphan

If you're ever bored, beat up an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Fish

I still can’t forget that tiny little dead fish in my blue lunchbox.

Baby

What's yellow and blue and found at the bottom of a pool? A baby with slashed floaties.

Memes

Car

Like if you can relate and comment if you think this is funny

The image consists of two panels. The top panel shows a text saying "7 y/o me in my dad's car: Dad, I wanna turn on the light. Can I press this button?" with an image of a hand about to press a car light button. The bottom panel shows a text saying "My dad:" with an image of the character Rocket Racoon from the movie Guardians of the Galaxy saying "No!! That's the button that will kill everyone".

Orphan

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

It’s because they can’t find home plate.

Fish

Lil Johnny looked in his pants and couldn’t find his fish, so he started to yell out, "Lil fishy, lil fishy, lil fishy!" They called child support and sent the parents to jail for putting a fish up a child’s butt.

Little Johnny

Mom: Go clean your room, Little Johnny.

Little Johnny: No, it’s my room.

Mom: Well, it’s my house.

Little Johnny: Then go clean it.

Mom: Go to school!

At school:

Teacher: Hi, Little Johnny. You’re late.

Little Johnny: Watch because my son of a bitch mom told me to clean her room. I told her no, it’s my room, and then she said, 'Well, it’s my house.' Then I said, 'Go clean it,' and then she told me to go to school.

Teacher: Johnny, go to the principal’s office! You just came into school and now you're causing trouble. Go!

Orphan

Stop with dumb orphan jokes, you dumb ass people!!!!!!!!!!

They're not funny one bit, so stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sister

Me: Sister, stop stealing my stuff or I will make you feel bad.

Sister: No, I won't stop.

Me: Fine, I'm telling the world what you did.

Sister: What? You will see when I post it.

Sister: WHY DID YOU TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD?

Me: BECAUSE YOU DON ́T HAVE A LIFE.

Grade

When you get home and see your parents with your grades in their hands.

Twenty minutes later, they're slapping you with the belt.

Orphan

Why do orphans play baseball?

Because they have to run back to home base.

Orphan

Did you know that an orphan can take a selfie and a family photo at the same time?

Kid

What does a frozen loading screen and a Make-A-Wish kid have in common?

They both couldn't make it all the way.

Height

You're so short, I bet your parents left you at home most times when they went to the pool because they're scared you'll drown in the kiddie pool.

Orphan

Q: Why can’t orphans play baseball?

A: They don’t have a home to run back to.

Orphan

Why do orphans love playing with boomerangs? Because it always comes back.