Childhood jokes

Your dad went to get the milk, but he was actually trying to find his father. He wasn't there.

The orphan was playing baseball. He hit a home run. His coach told him to run home. He couldn't find it.

A favorite childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather, that is until my mom took the urn away from me.

An orphan? We no jokes.

Jokeless orphan since they were always stacked on jokes.

One day, Billy's teacher asked him, "I heard your mom had a baby. What did she have?"

Billy paused and thought for a moment and said, "I think she had a bicycle."

"Now Billy, you know that your mom didn't have a bicycle. What did she have?"

"Maybe it was a tricycle."

"Billy, don't stand there and lie to me. We're going to the principal's office right now!"

The teacher grabbed Billy and escorted him to the principal's office and explained what happened. The principal looked sternly at Billy and said, "Stop lying, Billy. You know your mom didn't have a bicycle or a tricycle. What did your mother have?"

Billy looked up, fear in his eyes and said, "Well, maybe she had a go-cart."

That was more than enough. "I'm calling your mother right now!"

Soon, Billy's mother arrived at the principal's office. "It seems that Billy has decided to start telling lies. His teacher asked him what you recently had, and he said a bicycle, then a tricycle, then a go-cart!"

Billy's mother teared up, and through her sobs, replied to the principal and teacher, "No. Sadly, I had a miscarriage."

Billy sat up straight and said, "I KNEW that damn thing had wheels!"

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

Because they can’t find home plate.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because there would be no home base.

What is an orphan’s favorite beer?

Fosters.

What is a kid's favorite thing to do with their dad?

Play pretend dog in the bed.

What's the same about a newborn and a football?

You can kick them both very easily.

Have you heard about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.

What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?

The second-hand book was loved once.

One time Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction from eating 12-year-old nuts.

Dad: We are giving your toys to the orphanage.

Kid: Why?

Dad: So you won't get bored.

You know why orphans can't play baseball? 'Cause they can't find home.

Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor?

Because it can't hit home.

I like abusing orphans, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Why did the orphan go to the playground?

To see if it could find its parents.

Mom, can I be a firefighter when I grow up?

Mom: Oh, you won't grow up, Caillou.

Let's go punch some orphans, who are they gonna tell, their parents? 🤣🤣🤣