Child jokes
Why are orphans lucky?
Because they can get in trouble and nobody can tell their parents.
What did the mom say when her child came out?
"The head was so big!"
And Mary said God had given her a child, so Joseph went and joined Fathers For Justice.
What's the one upside to being an orphan?
You never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Memes
What’s the difference between a fruit and an orphan? One gets chosen :)
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
Me and my friends jumped some orphans. Who will they tell? Their parents?
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't make a homerun. 😂😂
What's the difference between a paralyzed kid and a father?
The father gets to leave, while the kid stays.
If a lion ate a child, is the lion a child predator?
When you see a kid yelling and you wanna leave :(((((((
What is cold and alone?
An orphan's parent.
What's breakdancing, twitching, and noisy?
A child with epilepsy.
Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.
A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old lady's house...
Old woman: Oh my! Goodness sakes, child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???
Child: Both.
What is an animal that kids get for Christmas and can easily give to someone else?
A white elephant.
My 3 year old sister kept saying, "I like your cut, G." Every time she does, I dodge and close my eyes, but she's the one who always ends up running.
Your birth certificate is like an apology from the condom factory...