Child jokes
What do you call a boomerang that does not come back?
An orphan's parents.
What sits in the corner and gets smaller and smaller? A baby with a potato peeler.
What do most 50-year-old men put inside their cars?
Children.
Broccoli is like anal sex. If you're forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.
Why do orphans like the number seven? It's lucky, so maybe their parents will come back.
What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy children.
What do you call an orphan?
A bootysnagger45.
Why can't orphans play cricket?
Because they can't find home.
Poop poop poop poop poop poop pp ppppppppppppoppppppppppooooooooooooooooooooppppppppppoooooopppp children pooooooooooooooooop in diapers.
Why did orphans play Poppy Playtime?
To get a family.
Little Johnny was playing with his train and said, "All you motherf*ckers who want to get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who want to get on, get on." His mother hears him and asks, "Is that you cussing?" The mother said, "Go to your room for 1 hour." Little Johnny goes to his room, then comes back one hour later and said, "All you motherf*ckers who wanna get off, get off, and all you motherf*ckers who wanna get on, get on, and if you wanna know about the 1 hour delay, go ask the b*tch in the kitchen."
I like my kids how I like my lights, Hanging from the ceiling.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
When my son was little, he loved to draw. Although he would always rip up the paper whenever there was one little slip up. Too bad he became a tattoo artist.....
When I go to bed, my mother comes in ten minutes later with a brick and beats me with it.
What is the difference between an orphan and Pikachu?
"Pikachu, I choose you!"
Guess why orphans can't play baseball? Because they don't know what home is.
I make baby mush.
Why are orphans only able to have iPhone X's? Because it doesn't have a home button.
What is the difference between an adopted kid and an orphan?
If you're adopted, you're actually wanted.